Expectant mother reveals how she embarrassed a stranger who told her not to drink coffee

A pregnant woman has revealed her trick for putting off people who offer unsolicited advice to expectant mothers, after being advised by a stranger not to order coffee.  

The mother-to-be from New York, who goes by the name of Jax on Twitter, explained how a bystander told her she should be drinking decaffeinated coffee after hearing her order at her local Starbucks. 

However, she swiftly got her own back and left the stranger speechless, by replying: 'I'm not pregnant'. 

Her tweet racked up almost 78,000 shared and and more than 698,300 likes, as other users shared their experiences of strangers thinking they have 'ownership' of pregnant women's bodies.  

Recounting the experience, Jax said the stranger had told her, after overhearing her coffee order: 'You know you should be drinking decaf when you're pregnant.'

When she said she was not pregnant, the mortified bystander replied: 'I am so, so sorry.'

'And that's what you get for giving unsolicited advice,' the tweet concluded. 

Other women chimed in to say they had had similar conversations with well-meaning but intrusive strangers. 

One woman wrote: 'A male coworker once said to me as I was eating a McDonald's cheeseburger and fries, "you should eat something healthy, like a salad." 

'I was vegetarian up until my sixth month. I literally hadn't had McDs in 15+ years. I looked at him as I shoved it in my mouth and said "shut up Eric".'

Another added: 'I had a woman next to me in live for a movie ask me about my birth plan. I politely told her she was not part of my plan.' 

And other parents revealed the advice didn't stop after the baby was born either. 

'I was breastfeeding and an old woman came up to say I ought to go to the washroom. I just said "I'm so sorry about your neck." 

'She said there's nothing wrong with her neck. So I replied "then turn your damn head and look away or there soon will be." She was so flustered, she left,' recalled another. 

'My favorite reply has always been: "Thank you, but we've chosen to raise her poorly"' one father wrote. 

'As a new father carrying my crying child in public, invariably I'd get people coming up to me and telling me what was wrong: hungry, tired, etc. I'd respond that she was fine, just upset about [current news item]. Worth it just for the blank stares,' another one shared. 

Other women said their doctors actually advised them to drink coffee during their pregnancies, while other added their own children ended up fine after they drank the hot beverage while they were pregnant.  

'I remember when I was pregnant I stopped drinking anything with caffeine and I ended up with migraines my ob/gyn doctor told me to get a cup of coffee,' one mother said. 

'I had one Diet Coke a day during my entire pregnancy. She was born healthy and continues to be healthy and happy and smart 15 years later. 

'I drank regular coffee through all three pregnancies. My kids are practically perfect. F*** ppls advice! You do you,' one wrote. 

'Isn't it amazing how you become everyone's property when you are preggers,' asked another. 

'Next person that says something like that, really blow their hair back by telling them you need the coffee to get rid of the hangover you have. Grown folks need to mind their business,' another said.

Some women also revealed strangers had rubbed their belly out of the blue during their pregnancies.  

'Once a woman just came up and started rubbing my belly, so I just grabbed her boob. She was so shocked and offended for some odd reason,' one wrote.   

What's the medical opinion?  

It is recommended that pregnant drink no more than 200mg of coffee a day during their pregnancy. This represents two cups of instant coffee or one cup of filter coffee 

Consuming more than that amount can lead to higher health risks for the fetus, such as a low birth weight.

A low birth rate can lead to health issues when the baby gets older.

'I had several odd encounters when I was approached by strangers asking how far along I was while pregnant with twins. The most immediate response was to reach out and touch my belly and it felt totally invasive.'

Some women explained it made them feel as if their bodies were not their own, and called the behavior intrusive and inappropriate.   #

'When you're pregnant it's strange enough to lose so much of you body autonomy to the baby, but then everyone else confirms it's no longer your body as well. It's the worst part about about being pregnant,' Jax agreed. 

Ans whilst some Twitter users came to defense of the Starbucks strangers, the pregnant woman made sur to point out she had sought out advice from qualified professionals :  

'You're right, I don't have any concern for my baby. I should follow the advice of random people at Starbucks instead of my doctors, midwives and the actual research,' Jax sarcastically wrote to one Twitter user who said she should be grateful for the advice the stranger gave her.

stella Posted on August 15, 2019 11:21

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